My Dad's a DJ, Episode 2: Let's get Retarded!

Here's my dad and some white guys with the member of the Black Eyed Peas (labeled):


There are many favorite parts in this one. Let me tell you them!

1. The three white guys look soooo scared. And you know what? They should be. The black-to-white ratio is 1 to 1 (and I'm counting that pasty Taboo as black, cuz...there should be at least a little in him.)

2. Will.i.am is touching my dad like they're father and son in a family photo. His touch is possessive, as if to say, "This is mine. Can you believe my sperms made this? Neither can I!"

3. Taboo is either giving us the A-OK or he is holding an invisible doobie. I'm gonna agree with the latter, cuz he's probably rich enough to afford invisible drugs (them's is pricey drugs).

4. Fergie-Ferg. Where are your breasts? And is that the same track outfit that you peed onstage in? Did you wash it before you put it on? Did Taboo give you some of his Invisibo-Pot? I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS AND YOU CAN'T ANSWER ANY OF THEM BECAUSE YOU ARE A PICTURE.

5. Just so the Apple guy (his name has the word 'apple' in it, I swear it does) doesn't feel left out, I'll say something about him: You're wearing too much denim and you look like a cowboy villian in the face. Have a nice day.

My Dad's a DJ, Episode 1: Bringing Sexy Back

So my dad is a DJ in Denver. Every time he sees a celebrity, I am never with him (except that time he played softball with Meatloaf) and with the station he's working for now, it's more than usually someone whose music I hate.

This first one though is one I like:

This is my dad with Justin Timberlake. I know this because he has typed it in the right-hand corner of the picture.

With Justin's hand, which is as big as his face, he's pointing at my dad as if to say "This guy? This guy is the shit. I'm not kidding. Think I'm kidding? Do you see my boyish smile when I say this? No? Exactly. The shit, yo." My dad is slightly turned into Justin, big ol' smile on his face as if to say "HURRR I'M WITH JUBSTIN TIMBERLOCKS WHAT A HAPPY BOY AM I!"

Either that or he's totally copping a feel, his hand resting under the butt, close to Justin's taint, with only designer jeans and maybe underwear in-between...

Whoa, I just blacked out for a moment. Did I just type that? Shaaaame on me for even thinking that! Sorry, Dad.